Howdy all! I’m writing this on 3 hours sleep. Logic would say I should have an early night. But I’m not the logical type. That can only mean one thing – I’m going to come crashing down any moment.
I don’t know why I feel compelled to write this post in advance. I have several days before I plan on publishing. I guess sometimes it just makes it easier to voice the trauma my little humans cause.
Not to sound big headed – but I tend to handle a lot of my parenting duties quite well. Don’t let that fool you though. For I have a big chink in my armour…
Toilet training a toddler.
Mrs OddFather insisted we toilet train the OddSon the moment he turned 2. That’s all well and good but it changes the dynamics of how I spend time with him. He’s good when we’re able to provide the consistency of taking him to the toilet – but he’s prone to regression. Leaving me feeling very anxious whenever we’re more than 120 seconds away from the nearest toilet.
Just when I feel we’re making progress, he turns. I take him to the toilet – he says he doesn’t need a wee. Eventually I release him. Then he pisses himself. I run to grab a cloth but before I even get the chance to tackle the piss… he poos himself.
Oh sorry, I should pre-warn this is not a post for dinner time!
And then comes the clean-up operation.
For long time readers of this blog, you may realise this isn’t the first poo story I’ve shared relating to the OddSon. And it certainly won’t be the last given what I’ve learnt recently.
Some parents give the bulk of the work to the nurseries to deal with. I can’t help but feel they don’t bother as much as we’d hope and fail to spot rogue wees and poos until much later.
But I get it – it can be a bit overwhelming when there’s a bunch of toddlers pooing themselves everywhere.
A week ago I did the usual nursery pick up. When the OddSon was handed to me I couldn’t help but notice the nursery worker was a little pale in the face.
I asked if all was well.
She replied yeah… but put on a serious face.
What could have happened? The OddSon seemed happy enough – no injuries that I could see.
She continued… “Today, the OddSon had a poo accident”.
No surprises there – pretty regular occurrence. He does like to bless most rooms he’s in throughout the week.
“He was playing in the garden when the incident occurred.”
Okkkk.
“Then he decided to go down a slide.”
Yikes! Turns out he left a trail of poo down the slide. I apologised profusely for the mess. I can relate, it happens in all sorts of places at home too.
She wasn’t done.
“Before we had a chance to clean the poo from the slide… “
Yeahhhhhhh…
“…several other toddlers decided to go down the slide after him.”
The other kids went down the slide and were covered in his shit!
COVERED IN HIS SHIT!!
There had to be a mass clean up exercise.
Guilt doesn’t even cut it. I wonder if they mentioned what happened to the other parents. I know we can’t fully control this stuff but I would feel livid if the OddSon came home after a day in which he was covered in another kid’s shit.
So this is where we are today. He’s still learning. The advice is to keep going, stay consistent, and eventually it clicks.
Apparently there isn’t a shortcut.
Unfortunately for the nursery staff, there also wasn’t a shortcut around the slide.
As for the nursery worker who had to deal with the aftermath… let’s just say our relationship has changed.
Every morning at drop-off we make eye contact for a brief second.
Then we both look away.
We know what happened.
