Posted by Good morning all. It’s 4.51am as I type this. I can’t sleep so figured what’s the worst that can happen in writing a post in a bit of a daze. Not sure what’s causing the lack of sleep. Maybe it was the kebab I indulged in last night? Maybe it’s the Arsenal win against Aston Villa that’s keeping me chirpy? Or… Or… maybe it’s the over-excitement I’m feeling due to the fact Mrs OddFather and the OddKids return from their Australia trip tonight!
It’s been a strange 4 weeks without them. I mean, I’ve started a new job so that’s been a nice distraction. But I’m not one to take my work with me into my weekends (sorry, boss), so that only accounts for 160 hours. And I guess I’ve slept roughly 196 hours, so that’s left 316 hours to keep myself busy. Not that I’m counting.
So, how have I kept myself busy?
Week one
There was a bit of a rush getting out the house for the airport drop off. So, when I eventually returned home, I came back to a house that was turned upside down.
Ah who am I kidding, the house is pretty much always upside down these days. All the more reason to give it a deep clean. After some recent house renovations, Mrs OddFather has been talking about getting a company in to give the house a proper once over. But for me that’s a waste of money when I know I can do a better job myself. Hence, I went and cleaned every spot throughout the house: clutter cleared, dust dusted, bathrooms polished, floors vacuumed and mopped, windows and mirrors shined, bedsheets washed… you get the idea.
I even had time to do a bit of gardening. At the end of the weekend, I stood tall in a house that was spotless. No indication whatsoever that a child lived here. No handprints, no stickers stuck everywhere… and I then realised the ramifications of an overly clean house – it no longer had character. I missed the OddKids more having cleaned their mess.
Week two
I figured it was time to get a job done I’ve been putting off for a year. Painting the hallway. That meant the ceilings, walls, banister, skirtings, doorframes, and the doors upstairs and down. What I assumed was a job for one weekend turned out to be nothing but. At 2am on the Sunday I found myself over-stretching on a ladder wedged on the staircase and realised this was a bigger job than I expected. I came off the ladder in defeat.
…Only it didn’t look quite that cool.
Week three
With banister, skirtings, door frames and doors remaining to be painted, this was the job for weekend 3. Got to the end of Saturday and still had 11 doors to paint. I gave up.
Exhausted from a few weeks of work, I deserved a break. I sat back, stuck on the surround sound, and watched the Aliens movies. Believe it or not, this was the first time I’ve watched these movies. Truth said, I scare easy so have never fancied it before. But with the new movie out I decided to do a bit of a marathon. And it was daylight so was less chance of wetting myself in fear.
Of course, having binge watched all but one Alien movie, I was living in a state of paranoia. I went to bed that night to find a HUGE spider in my room. I contemplated sleeping in the spare room. However, this is MY house. The spider was not going to win. So, I did something I’m not proud of. I grabbed the vacuum and… I don’t need to spell out the rest.
Week four
And that brings us to this weekend. Where I completed the cycle by giving the house a clean from top to bottom again ready for the return of my OddFamily. Not without enjoying my last night of freedom eating a kebab and watching Avengers Endgame in full surround sound at a volume that still has my ears ringing now.
Mrs OddFather and the OddKids must be stopped off somewhere in China I think, as they await the second leg of their journey back home.
I don’t think I can put into words how much I’ve missed them. It’s cliched but those kids definitely give me more purpose in life. Yes, there’s times where things can be stressful, where the OddDaughter doesn’t listen, or the OddSon has an explosive poo that requires a change of clothes for both of us… but that life is much better than a life without them but with facehuggers and chestbursters in space… Ok, maybe I shouldn’t have binged the Alien movies.
How long before they come back and I realise I need a break from the kids? I give it a week!
Right, maybe now I’ve got that off my chest I can get some sleep. Wait… off my chest? Like… a chestburster! #ShockingTwist
Night (or morning) all x